Instinct
by littlestrick
Summary: Cedric and Sofia suffer the ultimate loss before what's theirs is returned to them. But at what cost? Rated T for heavy, adult themes. No language, no lemons.


Instinct

This was something Cedric could never have prepared for.

There had been lectures, interviews with experienced practitioners, even some hands-on experience, but everything was presented with a positive spin. _Instincts will kick in_ , they had all said, _and you'll know what to do_. But it turned out his instincts were overshadowed by his shock.

The room, after being filled with so much movement and sound, was still and silent. He could see Sofia clinging to her mother's arms as Miranda held her to the bed. His wife was weeping in a way Cedric had never seen before. Roland stood just beyond them, stunned into immobility as he stared at _his_ wife and child. Cedric felt his feet moving to the window, the unreal dawn light washing over the small weight in his hands. He looked down and the past half hour came rushing back.

"Push!" The midwife had ordered. Cedric felt Sofia's grip crush the little bones in his left hand as her knees were pressed back towards her ears and she curled forward. Her mouth was open in a silent scream of effort as the midwife declared "That's the head! Just one more push for the shoulders and that's it. Come on, Sofia. Once more." The order was more patient but still telling. But as Cedric looked from his wife's face to this woman, he felt his elation get drained away by her expression. Sofia gave her last push and collapsed back, worrying her head against the pillows as she tried to catch her breath.

"You were amazing," Cedric said as he mopped her sweaty brow with a cool cloth.

"Why isn't...crying...wrong. Cedric…please..." He had barely been able to deny her anything in all of his time knowing her but in this moment as Sofia's eyes bore into his, drowning in worry and exhaustion, Cedric lept to his feet. He didn't even look to his mother-in-law to ensure she would be there for Sofia; he knew she would be.

The baby was...passive. It was the kindest term his mind could find for what he saw. She wasn't moving and the skin he had expected to be so pink was instead ashen, her impossibly tiny facial features touched with blue. Cedric was at war in his mind; he was overwhelmed with emotion as he fell in love with her instantly, overtaken by a need to protect her all the while being hammered by a sense of helplessness that he didn't know how to resolve. He stared at the midwife as she worked, unable to take in what she was doing. Time passed, he couldn't know how much. The midwife handed him a clean, bundled, still baby and murmured things like " _birth asphyxia"_ and " _these things happen"_ and " _so sorry for your loss"_ before quietly excusing herself from the room.

That's when the pain washed over Cedric.

Sofia's wails shook him to his very core, so much so that he had to lean against the wide frame of the window for support. He stopped looking down, it hurt too much to see the tiny, motionless body of his daughter. He pressed her against his chest. She was still warm. How could she still be warm if she was...He felt a piece of him fade away that he hadn't known was his to lose until he felt this little girl, lifeless in his arms. He shut his eyes tight and pressed his nose to the top of her head. Her tufts of dark hair somehow smelled like everything good and right in the world which couldn't be possible when nothing good could exist ever again.

Instinct took over, just like they said it would. Unknown energy surged into him through the light that had begun to beam into the room from the sunrise. Magic. _Magic_. How could he not have thought of magic? His hand, splayed across the back of his daughter, had begun to glow. _Because there's a cost. Magic like this always comes with a cost. Will you pay it?_

There wasn't even a second's worth of hesitation in Cedric's resounding, silent _YES_.

Breath slipped away as sunlight blinded him. Unbearable heat coursed through his body and he felt like his blood might boil him alive. It faded the instant after it appeared, replaced by a stabbing sensation somewhere behind his heart and deep into his soul. And then that was gone, too. Cedric gasped audibly and slid down the frame of the window, desperately drinking in the cool air into his lungs as his ears were assaulted by infant cries of life. He cried, then, unable to stall the tears of joy, unable to understand exactly what he had given in payment, unable to care as his daughter breathed in, just as he did.

Miranda was beside him, her face astonished as she took the baby from his arms. He could see Sofia, unable to get out of the bed but reaching out in desperation to hold her living child. Cedric was disoriented. Strong arms helped him to to his feet and embraced him. Roland was speaking to him, looking at him square in the eye, thanking him and recognizing him in a way he never had before. Roland helped Cedric to Sofia's side and he sat beside her. He rested against the headboard and she against his chest, their daughter nestled against Sofia, eagerly soothed by her breast.

They were together. Their family, so briefly broken, was whole again. Sofia thanked him endlessly, almost nonsensically as she recovered from her grief at a loss no longer lost. Cedric held to his girls, his loves, both brimming with intoxicating vitality and let himself forget, at least for now, whatever it was that he had so willingly spent. There would be time enough for that tomorrow.

* * *

 **A/N: A huge thank you to Jessibelle811 for this story prompt. She briefly described this scene in her head to me and it turned into this. I hope I've done you proud!**

 **This brings up an interesting point - I am happy to listen to and potentially take on story prompt ideas that _you_ might have! If you like my writing, like my perspective, give me something swimming around in _your_ head and let me take a stab at it!**

 **This is a one-shot for now. I feel like it could turn in to something bigger. I sort of wrote it that way. I reserve the right to add on to it later, but for now, this is it!**

 **As always, thank you for your views and especially for your reviews. Feedback is such a wonderful thing to have and what an amazing avenue this site is to receive it. Thank you for your time!**


End file.
